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[Wednesday
01/07/09 at 3:03pm] |
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mood |
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 content |
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The holidays treated me super nicely! I got a really sweet sewing machine :D its called... the "THREADBANGER" and it's written on it in old english :x i really need a table to set it up on. I also got a new car! It's kind of sad leaving my old car behind, i had so many good times with that car, but then again..my new car is really nice so it's not really all that sad ;] I'm excited for classes to start, I feel like I currently have too much free time. But the weekend before they start I'll be in austin. I'm gonna stay with nash and be silly girls being girls like always.
new years resolution:
start exercising again so I can fit into my clothes :[
oh and for those who didn't know i had eye surgery! I have retinal tearing, so they had to go in and sew a permanent "buckle" around my eye. it was really gruesome and I'm glad it's almost over with and healed..until i have to do the other eye :[
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[Saturday
11/22/08 at 12:55pm] |
WHAT SHOULD I PUT ON MY CHRISTMAS LIST?! I don't really know who uses this pretty often anymore, but does anyone have any good book/movie suggestions? I don't really need any electronics or anything, but asking for $$ is so boring, I'll just buy a bunch of clothes I won't ever wear. :[
I exercised today and I am seriously feeling the burn, and I hate research papers D:
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| myself |
[Sunday
08/03/08 at 1:50am] |
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mood |
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 depressed |
] |
I have no idea who I am anymore. I feel as if i've been walking around blindly for the past year with no sense of self or direction, and I don't know how to feel normal again. I used to have aspirations and standards, but not anymore. ...so tired of all the fucking apathy.
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| man |
[Sunday
05/25/08 at 9:07am] |
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i got super wasted in front of my whole extended family at my graduation party last night and acted a foooooooooool :[
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[Sunday
05/04/08 at 8:39pm] |
I haven't been to the valley since august, but I might be going to utpa.. i just really need a roommate, so if anyone is interested or knows of someone who needs a roommate let me know!
Prom was one of the worst nights I've had for a while.
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| oh god |
[Thursday
01/03/08 at 3:45pm] |
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to top it off
victoria's secret was having a sale.
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| g'day ;p |
[Thursday
01/03/08 at 11:43am] |
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mood |
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cheerful |
] |
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music |
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ben gibbard something |
] |
birds are chirping outside, and it feels a lot like spring. i'm really in love and i have like 500 new watercolor pencils. + i have a victoria secret giftcard to go spend! it's a good day.
to top it off i feel pretty?
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| goodbye 2007 |
[Monday
12/31/07 at 2:45pm] |
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i've changed so much, and i'm entering 2008 not really knowing who i am. i'm just kind of floating around right now. i had my 18th birthday yesterday. it was alright, i didn't party or anything. (i rarely do anymore) but earlier this week i tried acid. ? idk man i guess victoria acid isnt very strong so me and eli are already trying to get more. my body felt like it wasnt mine and i guess things looked...interesting? but nothing crazy, no hallucinations or anything. soo i'm for sure not only taking one hit next time, and that's because we bought two hits for each of us and eli's gangster cousing fucking took two of them :[ i was like FUCK YOU LUKE THAT WAS PART OF MY BIRTHDAY PRESENT. oh well
happy 2008 everyone!
i kind of want to drink tonight, but everytime i do lately i just get sleepy or my tummy hurts.
i'm a loser baby
so why don't you kill me ;p
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[Sunday
12/16/07 at 8:53pm] |
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mood |
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 weird |
] |
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music |
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kings of convenience- i'd rather dance with you |
] |
Finally i have a day off work. i was beginning to have no life outside of starbucks. which by the way i have stopped drinking coffee at work because a) our drinks are ridiculously fattening, b) i'm tired of leaving work mega wired and not being able to sleep, and c) H2O is good for you! I haven't been drinking nearly enough water lately. I just really love coffee and root beer! :[ I've had a really great weekend. Friday i worked (like always) but i got off at 9, and me and Eli bought BOONES FARM hahahaha how strange of us. Anyway so we spent the night playing drunken mario 3 and scrabble. Scrabble was a challenge! Saturday i slept in (finally!) and didn't get out of work until 12:45 :[ then me and a bunch of work buddies ate denny's. You should have seen the look on our faces when the waitress asked if we wanted coffee. nooo thank you. Then today me and Eli pretty much became hermits and only left his cozy room to get food. Pay it forward came on TV and i cried :[ he laughed at me! then we ended up taking a 3 hour nap, SO GOOD. Then some other strange movie about some holy war came on so we watched that. Now i'm home procrastinating because i have to write a research paper tonight! :[
I turn 18 december 30th, so last night eli bought some acid for us! Sounds like i'll be having an interesting birthday.
I'm glad me and Eli are so happy together. i really have no one else in Victoria, and it helps that the one person i have, i really love.
goodnight strangers.
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| UGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH |
[Monday
11/05/07 at 12:31am] |
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so fucking tired of self destructive becavior and relationships. so tired of giving so much.
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| pathetic |
[Thursday
10/18/07 at 7:16pm] |
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mood |
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depressed |
] |
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music |
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figurine |
] |
is my life
is my mood
is my skin (?!)
is feeling really empty for no apparent reason. why am i the kind of girl who seeks for fullfillment and hapiness through relationships? who am i expecting to sweep me up and save me? people have problems of their own, everyone does. but i feel like the whole world should be focusing on me and my mood. i'm so selfish.
honestly.
and i have no reason to unhappy-- (?!) so what's with all the melodrama?!?!?!?!?!
pathetic is stressing about my skin when i hardly have the motivation to leave my bed.
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| wtf? |
[Monday
10/01/07 at 2:32pm] |
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mood |
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indifferent |
] |
grounded for three weeks
i'm not even angry or upset about my mom overreacting, i just don't care anymore. and i think that is pissing her off the most.
and to get under her skin even more i havent really spoken to her for two days.
i'm going to austin this weekend for rilo kiley anyway so that should be interesting. i wonder how that is going to extend my punishment.
the only thing that is going to suck about this whole grounding situation is going to be not getting to hang out and lay around with eli everyday :[ whatever maybe i'll buy some good books and start playing my guitar again.
either way the 'not speaking with my mother' thing is kind of like a game, it's harder than it sounds to not speak to someone who lives in your house.
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| i never post anymore |
[Tuesday
08/28/07 at 10:53pm] |
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mood |
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 tired |
] |
but i wan't to remember. first days of senior year=leaving my house at 7:30 to be at school on time, going home at 2 changing going to work at starbucks at 2:30 working till 9, going to eli's house to kiss him goodnight, arriving home and making myself dinner, doing physics homework, then CRASHING THE FUCK OUT.
later dudes, see you valley hoes this labor day weekend.
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[Friday
06/29/07 at 1:13am] |
3day acl passes! yessssssssssssssss
points for the man for suree ;p
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| party? |
[Sunday
05/13/07 at 4:08pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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chipper |
] |
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music |
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whatev |
] |
man, i threw a fucking amazing party yesterday hahahaha i dont even know how it happened, but it ended up being a shitload of people TOTALLY covered in highlighter drawings totally inebriated or rolling their balls off dancing and raving in a black light and strobe light in my living room. we looked like amazing glowing works of art moving nonstop. i didnt even mind busting my ass to clean my house before my parents came home. i havent seen people be that happy in a very long time.
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[Tuesday
01/02/07 at 3:50pm] |
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mood |
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drained |
] |
i'm a sad individual, and i'm not looking forward to this year at all. I want to lay in my bed and cry and wake up and find a time machine and go back a year or two, and then when thats over, go back in bed and cry some more.
the end.
(aka the beginning of 2007)
i've been crying for about two hours now. and i have to leave for work in 30 minutes and i cant find my black pants so i'll probably go cry some more. see you around.
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| ;D! |
[Wednesday
12/27/06 at 1:56am] |
me and loesche are back together dsjfhkjsdsda<333333333
what a terrible past few days it has been, but now i feel nice and warm and comfortable again.
so i guess all you other girl(s) can step off now ;p
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| man wtf |
[Tuesday
12/26/06 at 12:58pm] |
i'm fucking up and i can feel it and i want to go back and fix everything but i can't. i don't even know what my deal is anymore.
merry christmas
i got a job
it's pretty tight!
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[Monday
10/09/06 at 10:12pm] |
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happy birthday Mr. Lennon ;p
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| smitten kitten XD |
[Monday
09/18/06 at 11:54pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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no lj cut |
] |
| [ |
music |
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bigggiiieeeee |
] |
how amazing are we?
is he* ;p
in other news-
I bought really cute black/gold glitter legwarmers today.
and I guess most importantly: I'm doing alright. I mean, it's actually a pretty big bitch not having good friends nearby, but what can i do about it you know?
today i realized i need to stop wallowing and wishing i was somewhere else, because where is that going to egt me? Fucking nowhere. It's just making my make-up run and causing me to run out of tissues.
And that just can't happen! ;p
So I guess this is to me kicking ass around here and actually trying to make friends.
I'll do it.
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